I’m pretty sure the monster manual explicitly states that goblinoids are super kinky.
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“I guess that’s what I get for just handing out transdimensional hell-blades.”
“Gosh Satan, I didn’t mean to–”
“You know what, no, it’s fine. It’s fine! Just go.”
In other news, this exists: https://www.patreon.com/acstuart
It’s not officially launching until next week when I have a video up, but you can go ahead and pledge now or just take a look, and you won’t be charged anything until I officially kick things off.
“Geez, no need to be so crabby.”
“That’s it. I’m killing him.”
Nothing soothes his savage heart like the feel of wind on his skin and fabric in his white-knuckled clutch. If he critically fails his check to rip the shirt, does he put on a sweater?
“This is not ‘a few extra.’“
What a dog.
I asked my patrons for their one-sentence, out-of-context D&D quotes and they delivered. The first three out-of-context D&D illustrations, for the @yourDNDstories twitter. Become a patron to submit your own! http://tinyurl.com/o9x25mx
As an aside, due to the number of stories I’m getting about people’s characters secretly being bears, I’m considering changing the premise of this blog to ‘Your Character is a Bear but No One Knows Stories.’
And you know what? It really wasn’t.
Talk about a buzzkill.