Make like a tree and stand by as your friends are slaughtered.
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Mouse about it? Rat’s all, folks! I bet you rodent see that coming. I’m so sorry.
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Minotaur: Wow he was hot.
Goblin: I see what you did there.
Allo~
Taken from this post on the phenomenal Out of Context D&D tumblr. Go follow it!
Honestly, I used this one because out of the thousands of messages in my inbox, the premise here was so beyond ridiculous.
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Talk about a buzzkill.
“What do they even keep you around for?! I completely wasted my spell on you!” “Exactly.”
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<Later, standing over grave with remaining party members> There is nothing I could have done.
Nothing soothes his savage heart like the feel of wind on his skin and fabric in his white-knuckled clutch. If he critically fails his check to rip the shirt, does he put on a sweater?
Head-canon: The rest of the party was killed and eaten. Turning to the last remaining member, something about the healer’s peaceful slumber softens the hearts of the wolves. They adopt the healer into their pack and have many fantastic adventures in the deep woods. Later, the wolves are attacked in the middle of the night by an adventuring party, and the healer sleeps through the whole battle.
The original troll.

