Honestly, I used this one because out of the thousands of messages in my inbox, the premise here was so beyond ridiculous.
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Head-canon: The rest of the party was killed and eaten. Turning to the last remaining member, something about the healer’s peaceful slumber softens the hearts of the wolves. They adopt the healer into their pack and have many fantastic adventures in the deep woods. Later, the wolves are attacked in the middle of the night by an adventuring party, and the healer sleeps through the whole battle.
SWEAR TO MEOW.
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The original troll.
Taken from this post on the phenomenal Out of Context D&D tumblr. Go follow it!
*whispers sweet nothings into your ear but in infernal so it’s more like a maddening non-language that sounds of the abyss and feels of a thousand beetles crawling up your spine* ;)
<Later, standing over grave with remaining party members> There is nothing I could have done.
“This is not ‘a few extra.’“
“Lo, brave adventurers! Have you the mettle to take upon ye this noble que-AAHH” “SKREAUGUGHGHH” (violent noises)
As an aside, due to the number of stories I’m getting about people’s characters secretly being bears, I’m considering changing the premise of this blog to ‘Your Character is a Bear but No One Knows Stories.’